


Hijack

by Trivena_Butterfly



Category: Girl Genius (Webcomic), Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies)
Genre: Airships, Bang is not nice, Captain Jack is a Jäger, Gen, Humor, Rivalry, Sky Pirates, Swordfighting, jager
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:22:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28547820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trivena_Butterfly/pseuds/Trivena_Butterfly
Summary: Bangladesh DuPreewashaving a good day. Now, she has a nemesis.
Comments: 13
Kudos: 38





	Hijack

“You,” declared Captain Bangladesh DuPree, of the airship _Dread Dripping Fury_ , “are the worst pirate I have ever heard of.” She felt justified in that statement; as a Pirate Queen herself, she was clearly somewhat of an authority in the matter.

“But hyu _hev_ heard of me,” her opponent grinned back. Most people would have considered said grin to contain far too many of the wrong sort of teeth. Bang thought those fangs would make her some very nice scrimshaw.

She’d thought it was a myth, of course, like so many other things were; for all the strange things that Sparks brought into the world, sailors and airmen were in the habit of imagining far weirder. The tale of a Jӓgermonster who’d grown bored with raiding on land and taken up as an airship pirate - technically a privateer, but who’d argue with him? - should have been too ridiculous to be real.

“You’re not supposed to actually _exist_.” DuPree feinted slightly, and smiled inwardly as he didn’t react to the ruse. This was turning out to be one of the best fights, one of the best _days_ , she’d had in a long time. She was in such a good mood, in fact, that when her crew had taken the Jӓger’s airship, she might just add the survivors of his crew to the captives in her hold instead of killing them all. Mechanicsburger slaves would be a novelty that ought to fetch a high price.

She twitched her head to one side to avoid receiving her returned knife sharp-end-first. Oh, he was _good!_ Those braids would make a great set of curtain ties, once she’d made their current wearer very dead.

“Terribly sorry to dizappoint,” the Jӓger-Captain bowed, mock-formally, and nearly overbalanced as Bang’s sword flicked past his ear. He looked, sounded, and _acted_ drunk, but it was obvious that at least some of it was fake. Had to be. A real drunk couldn’t possibly have managed to land on _exactly_ the right loose plank to toss that other discarded dagger into the air like that, then accidentally flail around _perfectly_ to fling it hard enough to pin her hair to the wheel when she ducked.

Not his fangs, she decided, finding the handle with her free hand while the other caught his sword on hers, to give her enough room to kick him away; or the braids. No, she would have his whole _head_ stuffed and turn it into an ottoman, so she could have the pleasure of resting her feet on his skull of an evening.

As she yanked and tugged, trying to dislodge the blade embedded deep in the wood, the ship slewed to one side, and she could hear the yells and whoops of triumph as the other crew drove hers back to their own ship. Firm-but-hasty hands paused in their flight to grab her and remove the ship’s wheel from its mount, carrying her back to safety even as she shouted and swore vengeance.

Yes, definitely an ottoman. Then she could kick him in the face every day for this humiliation.

Back aboard her own ship, she took the crew’s report while they freed her hair from the souvenired wheel. It was going to be the closest they’d get to a trophy out of this, but she’d put work into getting her hair this long, dammit, and a few dents in the wood gave it history.

“They took the merchandise, Captain! All of it!”

“They did _what?!_ ” She straightened abruptly, tearing the last few strands loose from the dagger, and rushed to the rail.

It had been only the work of a few moments with a chisel, but it was long enough for the Jӓger’s ship to catch an updraft and begin to drift well out of range, even without the wheel to control their flight. She could see now the small crowd of prisoners - _her_ prisoners! - jubilantly waving down and taunting their former captors.

“ _You!_ ” she shouted. “Oh, I’m going to _get_ you, pal, and you’ll be remembering this day for what’s left of your SHORT, PAINFUL LIFE WHILE I SLOWLY SEPARATE YOUR RIBS FROM YOUR SPINE!”

He waved insultingly at her, and blew a kiss back across the gap. “Und _hyu_ vill be rememberink tis as the day hyu almost cot Jäger-Keptin Jeck Sparrow!”

**Author's Note:**

> Captain Jack Sparrow is reckless, gets into insane situations and then somehow out again, acts stupider (and often drunker) than he is, and is very attached to his hat. Really, I'm surprised I haven't seen him Jägerfied before.
> 
> And of _course_ he would run up against Bang.
> 
> We don't seem to know the name of Bang's airship, so I pulled one out of thin air.


End file.
